Control Freak
by Mandy2
Summary: Little LJ songficlet about how Lily's control freak habits irk James and how he plans to change that.


Disclaimer: I don't own too much, you know what I do and don't. MAJOR THANKS to ~sakura, who did the editing! And here you go

*I had no choice

but to hear you

You stated your case

time and again

I thought about it....*

Lily loved the new device that her friends, Sirius and Remus, had given 

her.It was a Potter & Potter product, a Magic Air Waves device, that 

broadcast songs from the future, Muggle or not.There was this really 

pretty song by a future artist, Alanis Morisette, that perfectly described a certain person Lily knew.

*You treat me like

I'm a princess

I'm not used to

liking that

You ask how my day was....*

That was James, all right.She liked to listen to the song during 

study hall, which was when all of her fellow fifth years were in boring 

classes, like Divination and Muggle Studies.Lily only took one extra 

class: Care of Magical Creatures.

*You've already won me over

In spite of me*

Lily had never gotten along really well with James Potter. The pair of 

them were always playing pranks on each other, and Lily had a knack for 

performing the longest and most well-performed speeches and insults 

Hogwarts had ever seen.

Potter was cute, if you liked the scrawny, messy-haired, playful-brown-eyes type. Tall, dark, and handsome.And he was smart, as even Lily, the school prefect, had to admit. He was also a major troublemaker, wholike to turn Snape's hair scarlet and gold directly before a Quidditch 

match, ensuring "that he was a Gryffindor supporter." Or so his excuse was. That was always good for a laugh, as Snape hadn't yet learned the counter-charm.

*And don't be alarmed if I fall

head over feet*

Every girl from the third year to sixth year had dated James Potter, even including the feather-brained Bertha Jorkins.

*And don't be surprised if I love you

for all that you are

I couldn't help it— 

It's all your fault....*

Every single week, without fail, an owl would flutter down to James's breakfast plate, the worst of all possible letters tied to its leg. Worse even than a Howler.This letter was sealed in a black envelope, and when you opened it, it was charmed to whisper the name of your relative that had died. No one ever explained to Lily why the Potters were always getting killed, but Sirius and Remus would join James in a moment of silence, and the entire Gryffindor table would fall silent as well. Then James would burn the Black Letter, right there at the table, with flames from his wand.The expression on his face was always eluding, unreadable.

Lily was constantly frustrated with James, who was teaching her to 

become a better Chaser in exchange for help with his Charms homework. He 

always caught Lily off guard. He was spontaneous. She never knew what he 

was going to say next.

Lily didn't hate James, as some thought. Their relationship had just 

always been a bit strained, and they weren't tight, like Lily and Remus 

and Sirius. James just....annoyed her.Not deeply, but in that childish 

way, so irritating and yet so lovable.

Recently, James and Lily had reached an unspoken agreement: under no 

condition would they speak to one another.Not many people knew the 

details.Remus didn't know, the nosy, Slytherin seventh-year Rita Skeeter 

didn't know, and thank GodSnape didn't know.Even Sirius had no 

clue, though Lord knows he tried to wrangle it out of both of them.

***

One sunny afternoon, Lily was arranging her outfit for a Hogsmeade 

visit later that day.It was comprised of a long, cream-white skirt, made 

of impossibly soft material (her friends suspected her of charming it), 

a pale, olive green sweater that brought out the emerald in her eyes, 

and a thin jacket for protection against the cool autumn air.Lily 

dressed neatly, pinned her hair up into a complicated updo, and slipped a 

small bag of gold into her skirt pocket, as her candy supply was running 

low.

Walking into the Three Broomsticks, Lily found a seat between Sirius 

and Remus, relieved that James wasn't present.Unfortunately, he turned 

up moments after she had settled into her chair, with Peter trailing 

faithfully behind him.

*Your love is thick

and it swallowed me whole*

James and Lily sipped their butterbeers silently, avoiding each other's 

eyes, while, in anticipation of a good time, all of the Gryffindor 

fifth years instantly flocked around their table. Amid the chattering and 

laughing, Madam Rosmerta walked over to the table with a letter from 

Lily's mother.It was sealed in a black envelope.

While the messenger owl awaited Lily's response by the door, she tore 

open the letter with trembling fingers.The throngs of people 

surrounding their table were deathly silent.James's mute, comforting smile 

made the realization of what the black letter meant hit her all the 

harder.

*You're so much braver

than I give you credit for....*

Lily's father had died.

Like every week in the Great Hall, there was a moment of silence.

Several of Lily's closest girlfriends put a comforting hand on her 

shoulder.Lily wasn't aware of them—all she felt was the burning of hot tears. 

Sirius and Remus had no idea what to do, or say. They glanced over at 

James expectantly, but were disappointed.The only person who could 

comfort Lily—who really understood how she felt— refused to speak to her. 

***

Gradually, the pain began to subside.Life at Hogwarts returned to 

normal.Just a few short months later, James and Lily were once again at 

each other's throats.Professor McGonagall's in-tray was piled high 

with notes complaining about the two prefects, and one of them read as 

follows:

Minerva:

Now, I know that James Potter and Lily Evans are the "pride of 

Hogwarts," according to Dumbledore.But I think this record of my afternoon 

Charms class must be taken into consideration as well.

9:00—James turns Lily's hair pink

9:02—Lily retaliates by turning James's hair green and silver 

(Slytherin colors)

9:05—All hair is restored to its natural color 

9:10—Lily discovers that sucking on her quill will produce a mouthful 

of purple ink

9:13—When James attempts to speak, nothing but orange bubbles issue 

from his mouth

9:24—Lily's now bright blue hair is adorned with yellow polka-dots

9:25—James's hair is replaced by a Slytherin flag

9:27—Lily's blue and yellow hair becomes a banner, reading, "I love 

Severus Snape" 

9:35—James's every other orange bubble is punctuated by a belch

9:40—"I love Severus Snape" is replaced by "I love James Potter"

9:45—James is sent to the hospital wing with a black eye, a Slytherin 

flag for hair, and trailing belching orange bubbles. Ms. Evans joins 

him, wanting to be rid of her "I love JamesPotter" pink and purple hair.

I really would have taken away points from Gryffindor, but James's 

progress in color charms was very encouraging, and Lily's 

orange-belching-bubble charm was a sight to behold. I tried to point this out to my 

class, but they were too busy crowding around Sirius Black, who had tried 

to intervene and emerged with numerous boils on his face and arms.

—Professor Flitwick

"What on earth compelled you to start that?" Lily Evans screamed at 

James Potter, as he lay in the hospital bed beside hers."Why are you so 

mad at me?"

She waited expectantly, but her only response was a belching bubble.

"Oh, yeah." She waved her wand in James's direction, and heated words 

spilled out.

"Mad at you? Why are *you* mad at *me*?You didn't even come to talk 

to me when...er...you got that black letter.Instead, you went to 

Peter, of all people! And—" James hesitated, as if he thought he might be 

going to far,"—and you couldn't even answer a simple question!"

"Well, excuse me, but that question was just a bit personal!You 

thought I would be able to answer straight out?What is your problem?"

"My problem?!? *You're* the one with a problem. Sheesh, I never knew 

the girl I fell in love with would play hard-to-get!You can't answer a 

simple yes or a simple no, or even a simple maybe?!You want to just 

keep me wondering, eh?I knew you were a control freak before, but...."

"I'm not a control freak! And I don't hate you, I just—" Lily stopped 

pulling out her blue and yellow hair. "Wait, did you just say—?"

"You know what your problem is? You hate me because you can't control 

me. You can't predict me. You don't have control over anything about me. 

You were able to control your family life, your schoolwork, Sirius and 

Remus, and all of Hogwarts. You have them all under your spell, but you 

can't take control of the person I am. I am what I am and that's why 

you hate me.

"When your father died it wasn't just hard on you because you lost him, 

it was even worse because you were no longer in total control.You 

couldn't bring him back.And now, you look at me and discover I'm not 

something that you can control either. And I never will be. So deal with 

it."

Lily just sat there, speechless, as James, who realized what he had 

just said, tore from the room.He ran down a random corridor, not quite 

knowing where he was going.His only thought was to get as far away 

from Lily as possible, so it was a bit of a surprise when he found himself 

skidding to a halt in front of the portrait of the Fat Lady.

"Codswallop," he panted, and the portrait swung forward to admit him.

James climbed through, spinning his wand aboved his head and muttering 

a counter-charm.His hair was instantly restored to normal.He 

plopped down into a chair in the empty common room, and ran his mind over the 

events that had just transpired.Man,Lily Evans was something out of 

his world. As his American uncle had once put it, true love was a 

reach-for-the-stars, over-the-moon, world-series kind of thing.And now 

that he was in love, James understood what he had meant.

*And don't be surprised if I love you

for all that you are

I couldn't help it

it's all your fault*

Meanwhile, Lily was pacing in the astronomy tower, too preoccupied to 

even correct her "I love James Potter" hair. Control freak? Her? Yeah, 

right. Okay, okay, maybe she was a little bit controlling. Okay, maybe a 

lot. And she *had* said once that she didn't like the fact the James 

was unpredictable....

*You are the bearer

of unconditional things

You held your breath

and the door for me*

Back in the Gryffindor Common Room, James's head was in his hands. 

*Okay. I admit it. I blew up. When Sirius started those rumors about me 

liking her, I panicked.And now she probably hates me, because she 

finally knows. I love her.*

***

Three months later, a spring picnic was organized, and many couples 

were looking forward to the occasion.The day of the picnic was 

beautiful.The Hogwarts gardens were blooming magnificently, and the scent of 

flowers and freshly mowed-grass drifted pleasantly across the grounds.

Spread across the grassy bank of the Lake were soft, purple chenille 

blankets, with small, glowing lanterns surrounding them. House-elves were 

running about, taking meal orders.Couples were spread across the 

blankets, chattering happily, some with intertwined hands.

Lily was looking down on them from her dormitory window.She had been 

debating with herself for the past half hour about whether to go or 

not, and now she finally made her decision.She dressed quickly in the 

outfit she had worn the day her Black Letter had come, and as she hurried 

down the stairs and into the common room, she just caught a glimpse of 

James climbing through the portrait hole in front of her.Apparently 

he too had just made up his mind.

They made their way down to the lake, Lily walking a careful distance 

behind James.When they reached the picnic, there were no blankets 

left, and so Lily watched as James climbed up into an empty tree, a tall 

one with thick branches. 

James, perched in the tree, looked down at his many admirers.He 

called to some, and smiled down at them, but one face further back stood out 

particularly.It was a very pretty face, surrounded by long, dark red 

hair that was fluttering gently in the breeze.The two big, emerald 

eyes glanced up at him, and the red lips curved into an ironic smile.It 

was Lily.

Everyone else was instantly forgotten.

James beckoned to her, wanting her to join him, and he saw her 

hesitate.But the next second she walked forward, and began to climb the tree 

as well.He smiled as she settled down next to him in the tree branch, 

looking uncomfortable.

"Sorry," she mumbled.

He waited until she looked up to speak."That's all right," he said 

finally, gazing into her eyes."I'm sorry too."

*I've never felt

this healthy before

I've never wanted

something rational*

Lily and James sat in the tree until well past midnight, talking, 

making up for lost time.At one point, James slipped his hand into hers.

Lily blushed, looked up into the night sky, and wondered if she'd died 

and gone to heaven.

*I am aware now....

I am aware now....*

He jumped from the tree, and extended an arm to Lily, helping her down 

as well.Soft music was wafting in the night air, coming from a 

balcony above them, and they began to dance.Lily wrapped her arms around 

James's neck, breathing deeply.She felt his arms slip around her waist.

Once again, the night took on that impossible, dreamlike quality.

*And don't be surprised if I love you

for all that you are

I couldn't help it

It's all your fault*

Above them, on the balcony, Professors Dumbledore, McGonagall, and 

Flitwick were gathered.They had been star-gazing, but a far more 

beautiful sight had attracted their attention.

"They make such a nice couple, don't you think, Professor Dumbledore?"

Gazing down at the dancing pair, Dumbledore smiled sadly.He knew that 

dark days were coming, that Lord Voldemort was gaining power rapidly, 

and happy moments such as this would not last much longer.

James and Lily knew, too, that this was a special moment. It was the 

moment they fell in love with each other all over again.Something 

inside Lily told her that difficult times were approaching, but nothing 

could make her sad right now, while she was in James's arms.I may have a 

war to fight, she thought, snuggling deeper into James's embrace, but I 

know now that I won't have to fight it alone.

"No, Padfoot, they'll hate us!"

"They'll thank us later, Moony.Trust me, they want this on film."

"Oh, all right. But you take horrible pictures. Give me the camera."

***

Years later, Harry Potter was in his dormitory, lying on his 

four-poster bed, and mulling it all over in his mind. The hard times were at 

their worst.Half of the Gryffindor House had either received Black 

Letters or had been the cause of them.Faces were swimming behind his closed 

eyelids; Ron's numb shock as he learned that his father had been 

killed, Malfoy's satisfied leer, and Professor Dumbledore's constant, worried 

frown.

Wondering how he was going to cheer himself up, Harry suddenly leapt 

out of bed and opened his trunk.After a few moments of searching, he 

dug out the photo album Hagrid had given him in his first year.He 

flipped to a picture of his parents, one he particularly liked. They were 

dancing on the bank of Hogwarts' Lake, beneath the stars and the full 

moon. Underneath, it said:

"They'll hate us, Padfoot."

"They'll thank us later, Moony. Trust me, theywant this on film."

"Oh, all right. But you take horrible pictures. Give me the camera."

And below that, in Professor Lupin's tidy script, it said: "James and 

Lily fall in love, Fifth year, March 31, 1975."


End file.
